To be honest, I probably would make a poor spy and an even worse superhero. Because I can't just change who I am at the drop of a hat. Unlike Clark Kent, if I slick back my hair and put on nerdy glasses, I'm still Gina...with my hair slicked back and nerdy glasses. A cape and thigh high red boots do not change my snarky sense of humor, my often too-large heart, and my love for kids and animals. (It might, however, improve my love life.) There is no brand name that will change who I am and how I see myself. This is probably why I'm not impressed with fancy homes, shoes that cost more than my first car, or purses with someone else's initials emblazoned all over the fabric. Issues that resonate with me when I'm sitting in my three-bedroom ranch house would mean just as much to me if I was a guest at a five-star resort in Tahiti. With me, what you see is what you get. For good or bad, richer or poorer, in sickness and in health.
If I call you "friend"--even if I only know you online, I value you as a friend. You can trust that I'm honest with you. I don't create an online persona that isn't clearly who I am in real life. I will not pepper my speech or posts with "facts" that are not true. I will not try to manipulate you into feeling something for me with lies or innuendo. I am me. And that's enough.
Which brings me back to my writing self. All of my characters--no matter how minor, no matter their gender--have something strongly indicative of me (a manner of speaking, a quirk, a favorite memory, etc.) built into their personalities. Okay, so I admit, I'm not 5'10" with long black hair and a killer body like one or two of my heroines, but I'm not talking about looks. I'm referring, of course, to soul. Soul: the wondrous bit of one's self that should be incorruptible, constant, and unique to each individual.
How much of your soul appears in your written work? Your online life? Or are you...perhaps...a spy? Inquiring minds want to know.
Labels: authors, soul, Writing vs. Real Life
posted by Gina Ardito aka Katherine Brandon at 7:18 PM
And the same with my characters. My characters are versions of me. Me being good, being bad, being selfish. Often when I return to edit I write something into the text only to find it a few phrases away from where I'm redoing it. Sometimes its better when I put it the second time, but mostly it was okay where it was so I revert back to the original freshly worked, spontaneous echo of me, my voice and I.
And yes. Can't say that I'd say no to being ultra rich, travel around in my own Lear Jet, buy every lovely home in every lovely city I feel like living in. "The grass is always greener on the other side" the rich tell us. And assure us it's not all its cracked up to be. Sure beats a speeding ticket on the highway I'm sure.
But once my mother said to me:
"Darling you must be so happy with your lovely home." Lucky I have one? Yes. Happy? Just because I have it? That's the difference between my mother and I. For her it's all the showcase. Look the part is self fulfilling prophecy.
No. Sorry.
For me it's inner ambition. My soul ambition. My soul is driven to the pursuit of ambitions I set myself. Mine is creative. WRiting to me is as breathing. It's automatic - I have no control over it. It consumes me, overtakes me.
And so for myself I can safely say:
I write therefore I am.